Republican Wet Dream

Pretext: this is something I've written for class. The subject was about Andrew Jackson's presidency and his policies, namely that of the rights of Native Americans (or lack thereof, in this case). All that being said, you should still take offense to this.

I believe the action (the Indian Removal Act) of the Government is for the good of the people? Why? Because the addition of another group of peoples would only make things more complicated.

First of all, that's another group that demands right. I mean, c'mon! Another one? Women and slaves are bad enough, but another group of people who should justifiably get the same rights and equal treatment; that's so sensical, I can't help but deny it! If we let them keep their land and become actual citizens of these God blessed United States, what's to keep them from getting their fully endowed Constitutional right? Like marriage or voting? They'd already get their right to follow Christianity, and hold it as the ultimate Truth and foundation this country was built on -- but legal recognition? Then we'd get slightly less tax money!

And another thing: they follow their own belief system. Who does that? Not real Americans, that's who! We fought them Brits for the right to do things out own way, and because of that, we have our own country. A country where we do things democratically and everyone (as long as they're white and male and straight) gets an equal voice! A country where we do our own thing. A country so great, everyone should follow its example. I fact, we should go help all those other countries, even if they didn't ask for our help. We love Jesus that much! Imagine if we ever accepted another belief or value as our own? That'd be like the president -- our dear King Jackson -- changing colors or something.

Finally, they're always fighting one another. There's, like, a dozen different tribes. None of them get along. It sounds more like the tagline for a reality show. But here in America, it's a mandatory to get along. That's why they have to be kicked out: they aren't like us, and slightly altering anything so it's mutually beneficial is too much work. No one in the 50 (or about that, what time period is it again?) has ever has a disagreement, discrepancy, debate, dissented, or differed on any issue. Ever. That is a fact. No need to look it up. That whole "Civil War" thing was just over which side toast lands on when dropped. And it wasn't so much of a war as it was a "Nation Wide Tea Party" where all the tea got switched for black powder and the cups switched for rifles. That's all it was.

I support equality. I support Jackson.

God bless America.