No Small Children

Do you know what stem cells are? If your answer was something along the lines of "in between the root and leaf cells" then congratulations, you have no problems with the following rage. If you said something along the lines of "THEY ARE TO NEVER BE USED," "IT IS A SIN," or "we should kill all the babies and harvest them," then you, sir and/or (I don't judge) ma'am, are -- in the kindest words I can muster at this moment -- a fucking twat.

Let's set something straight right now: I am a pro-baby-shooter. That's right, Kyle likes when things live. Go ahead, write that hate comment. I'll wait...

Done? Good. Right about now, maybe half of you are all "Kyle is one of us! Fight the good fight!" and the other half are something like "Are you that stupid and insensitive, Kyle? Why should someone be forced to <insert the line I hear every single time about why I should be pro-bortion>?!" And here's my message to the latter group: Shut up. My message to the former group: Shut up. Just because I support one side more than another means nothing except for that I have the capabilities to make a decision on my own. I could spend a whole rant about why I take the stance that I do, but that's not why we're here today.

Today, we're going to talk about stem cell research. For those of you who don't know what stem cell research is (i.e. the plant analog group), then let me explain it a bit.

Stem cells are undifferentiated cells. This means that they've yet to take on a specific role; they haven't specialized yet. They're like hopeful actors who've yet to get type-cast and be stuck in a miserable position until they die. Thankfully, they're children will follow in their footsteps and try to fulfill their parent's dream, and which point the process repeats. Anyway, these cells are highly valued because they can become any sort of cell they're placed around. A good amount of bad mojo could be curable with the use of stem cells. There's just one catch:

These cells usually come from unborn fetuses. True, they can also be located in bone marrow, but those stem cells are harder to get to and not as flexible.

Do you see where this is all going? Right along the fiery hell path that leads to baby land. Er... baby lovers versus baby haters? Baby obsessors over realists? Hell, I don't know. Let's put it terms I'm most comfortable with (those being insults): "Anti-choice and Baby Slayer." By the way, if anyone can give me better insults, it would be much appreciated. Anyway, there's the whole debate on whether it's moral or not to harvest said cells for medical research. But, like all great debates, people are too stupid and pig headed to come to a compromise about it.

So let's go with the great equalizer: Myself. Here's the plan: let's not purposefully kill whatever-you-want-to-call-it (I prefer nutrient parasite). However, if the (through whatever reasons, be they natural or otherwise) nutrient parasites weren't making it anyway or were micarried (but the cells still viable) then we can agree it's alright to do.

Side note: we can still get stem cells from developed humans. Even corpses! So really, if everyone stopped being  Jesus freaks/little bitches/whatever might insult you and donated some stem cells, then we might not even need to eradicate the vile womb infester! True, it hurts a lot, but can we all take one for the benefit of our entire fucking species?! You know what, I take the first part of that last statement back; donating stem cells is like giving blood, you little pansies. Just take this in for a moment:

Not a wimp.

This man can do it. Why not you?! There is legitimately not a reason why the general populace can't take a day to go donate something they hardly use so that research on a ground-breaking field of medicine can move further along without any of the moral disagreements that come along with the job. It's a win-win situation; the baby lovers keep their babies (for now) and the fetus abusers get their most holy of holy cells.

Stem cell research is an amazing field of study and one that, while I may not condone where some of the cells come from, it is one that I fully support. The possibilities of it are amazing and shouldn't be passed up just because a few people don't like the idea (which could be a rant of its own). Can we all just figure out how to compromise now?